Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
