hell yes lets make some ravioli
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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