and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
