I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
