Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
