Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
