I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize