He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
