My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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