I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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