You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
A+ Viking dick
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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