I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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