But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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