# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize