did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
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