I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
