So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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