Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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