I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
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