you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
