We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
