the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
