so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
