There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
