google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
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