He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
