Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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