You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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