i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
