do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
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yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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