Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize