I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize