Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize