It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
