I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
