i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize