Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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