Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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