My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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