I like to think it a success when the cops are called
accomplished twins. life is a go
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Randomize
