when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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