is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
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