yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Be still, my beating vagina.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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