Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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