he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
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