I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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