A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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