Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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