she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
