I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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