I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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