Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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